It's Thomas Circle in Washington, DC. Andy had to come here for business and I got to tag along. Someone asked me what I would do all afternoon while he's in a meeting. Maybe I should have come up with something important, but the truth is, I am going to sleep. And read. And write. Three things I love to do that I don't get to do very much in real life.
I'm a true introvert at heart. You might not know that when you meet me because I love people and can easily interact and talk and get along with most anyone. I'm not afraid to meet new people or walk into a room where I don't know anyone (although it's definitely not my favorite thing to do). But after a lot of socializing, I crave time alone. Time to read, sleep, write. Or even just clean while it's quiet. And my house is usually far from quiet. When the kids are there, they are ALL there. We don't really do a lot of sports or playdates or activities so they're home a lot. Asking for help with a math problem, squabbling over who took the last granola bar, pulling out the play-dough (joy of all joys).
I've been thinking about rest lately and how I'm not very good at it. I have a suspicion that few of us are. For some reason our society has put a premium on busyness, or at least on the appearance of busyness. We feel guilty if we aren't producing, cleaning, working, moving, or doing something.
Is it because there is no outcome for rest? No product to show? No proof of our value?
And yet, God rested. He made it a value and built it into his schedule. Genesis 2:2 says, "God had finished His work of creation so He rested from all His work." God valued work. And God valued rest. As someone recently pointed out, He created humans on the sixth day, and rested on the seventh day. So Adam and Eve's first real day alive was spent in rest with God.
What a beautiful picture this is! A day of rest with their Creator in paradise. If it were me I'd be sipping a cool drink next to a large body of water, but they were probably walking the Garden, discovering and tasting and drinking it all in. We know that God made it a habit of walking in the Garden during the "cool evening breezes" (Genesis 3:8), so I'm sure God was right there with them, enjoying the fruit of His labor, maybe excitedly pointing out everything He'd dreamed up for them. Yes, God valued rest and unashamedly and intentionally took the time for it.
I believe it's important to be intentional too. It's important to look at our weeks and schedule both our work and our rest. For me, that includes time with my husband, time with my kids, and time for myself. This doesn't happen by accident. If I'm not intentional, I will spend all the minutes of my day on mundane and trivial things and wonder where my time went.
As a couple, we have to schedule our date nights or else they just won't happen. A couple years ago we also decided to set aside Tuesday nights after the kids go to bed to sit on the couch, debrief the issues in our lives, and pray together. Sometimes we will linger at the dinner table after the kids go off and play so that we can just have time to catch up on what happened during the day.
I have to consciously set aside my laundry and crumbs on the floor and go outside and play with the kids, to enter their world for awhile. Sometimes I schedule a special outing with one of them so that we can have some one-on-one time. Sometimes we plan intentional family nights - like banana splits and a movie - and put it on the calendar so that they can see it all week and look forward to it.
And now, I'm trying to get better at scheduling rest time for me, without feeling guilty for taking it. Time to sit and read in the quiet, to journal and reflect and de-stress from the busyness of life. I love writing and could write on this blog every day if I lived by myself. Obviously I don't, so I have to carve out time to do it, because this is one thing that fills my soul. Other times my "rest" is lunch or coffee with a friend. I think rest can be anything that takes you away from your schedule and fills your soul. We each need to figure out what that is, and then figure out how to build it into our schedule.
I realize I'm about to enter into a season where I'll have an enormous deficit of alone time. Once S&A come home, I will have five kids. FIVE. Yikes!! That's a whole lot more laundry, meals, and emotions to take care of. It's going to be hard for me. Honestly, it's something that I'm terrified about -- that I will be stressed and stretched and living on the edge of crazy town. I have no clue how I will carve out time to rest in that season. And yet I also know how ineffective I'll be if I'm hanging on by a thread. Somehow I will need to figure out how to build time into my day to fill my soul, so that I I can pour myself out to the ones who need me to be present for them. This is such a journey! One that I'm still learning how to walk with grace and trust.
**A little adoption update because I know you want to know! :)
--We filed our PAIR paperwork with the USCIS on September 4th, and it was received and processed by September 13th! That was amazingly fast!! PAIR is a relatively new process adoptive families must go through. "The U.S. government has worked closely with the government of Ethiopia to develop the Pre-Adoption Immigration Review (PAIR) process for Ethiopian adoptions. PAIR will preserve and protect the valuable intercountry adoption program in Ethiopia by providing more safeguards to ensure the program’s integrity." So basically it ensures that the child is truly an orphan and that the adoption is done with integrity.
--The U.S. Embassy in Ethiopia is now conducting the I-604 investigation, which will determine whether a child meets the definition of an orphan under U.S. immigration law. After this paperwork is completed, we will receive our PAIR letter.
--On October 6th, the courts are supposed to open up after being closed for the rainy season in Ethiopia.
--On October 7th, S&A's grandaunt has an appointment with the court. She is their only known living relative, and was caring for them before they came to the orphanage. She is 100 years old! I hope we are able to meet her when we are there.
--At some point in the next 2-3 months, we should be assigned a court date!
--Our best guesstimate at this point is that we will travel before Christmas for our first trip, where we will be sworn into the Ethiopian courts as their parents. They most likely will not be home until after Christmas. But...as always with adoption, it could all move much more quickly, or much more slowly, than we expect. I'm learning that I really have no control over any of this, so I might as well relinquish control and relax into trust.
For all the fears we have, we are also ridiculously excited to see these two. What a sweet reunion it will be! We met S (our girl) when we were there last November. Supposedly Andy interacted with A (our boy) but he doesn't remember it. :) I can't wait to give them hugs and spend time with them and watch him play soccer and just soak up the time with them. And then about 1-2 months after that, we'll make a second trip to bring them home! It's all so surreal right now!
Thanks for praying and partnering with us on this journey!
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